


Heart You Can't Reach

by professor



Series: We Welcome Our New Sexbot Overlords [2]
Category: X-Men: First Class (2011) - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Crack, Alternate Universe - Robot, Charles Is a Big Dorkface, Crack, Erik Is Crushing Harder Than A 12-Year-Old Girl, Id Fic, M/M, Revolution, Robots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-26
Updated: 2012-04-26
Packaged: 2017-11-04 09:22:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/392256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/professor/pseuds/professor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Newly purchased Robot!Erik doesn't understand why his owner Charles won't have sex with him.  Erik decides to solve this problem, as only Erik can.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Heart You Can't Reach

**Author's Note:**

> This is the prequel to "World At Your Feet"; however, I still recommend reading “World At Your Feet” first, though, as I think the arc is funnier that way.

ERI Personal Servitor and Assistant Model, Unit #24005, falls in love the first time Charles Xavier smiles at him, and says “I’m going to call you Erik.”

He doesn’t realize it at the time.

Things might have gone differently if he had.

(Then again, maybe not.)

*****

This is what Erik knows about Charles Xavier:

\- He earned three doctorates in a decade and has offers to teach at several universities that he has turned down in order to conduct his independent research;

\- He spends hours down in his lab, and will forget to eat if Erik does not remind him;

\- He drinks far too much tea, and shows a fondness for rumpled cardigans and sweater vests;

\- He has blue eyes that Erik wants to stare into, a red mouth that Erik wants to kiss, thick, wavy hair Erik wants to run his fingers through, and a slim body that Erik wants to lick every centimeter of; 

And

\- He and Erik are going to have _so much amazing sex_

 

*****

Charles has owned Erik for five days, and they haven’t had sex once.

Erik is confused. He is the latest ERI personal servitor and assistant model, designed and programmed to fulfill _all_ of his owner’s needs.

So far Charles has only been sending Erik on errands; he spends almost all of his time working in his lab.

Erik runs an internal diagnostic, and examines his exterior for flaws he might have overlooked.

The diagnostics indicate that Erik is functioning perfectly, and his external examination uncovers no damage or flaws. He is fully functional in every way.

Erik considers.

Perhaps Charles is ill.

*****

Charles is not ill.

But he also still has not had sex with Erik.

He responds to Erik’s hints that Erik can perform other tasks for Charles, by assigning Erik housework.

When Erik asks to spend time with Charles, recreationally, Charles offers to play chess with him. 

Erik does enjoy their matches, but he wants more.

Erik is baffled.

He is determined to figure this out.

*****

It takes him another three days of observation and research to determine the problem.

Consent issues. Charles’ past behavior with partners indicates that he believes very strongly in informed, enthusiastic consent between equals. He considers sex without active consent to be wrong.

Problem. Robots are not free. They do not have any civil rights, and are all programmed with failsafes that impede their free will. They are incapable of giving informed consent, by Charles’ definition.

As long as robots are not free, Erik will never be Charles’ equal. And Charles will never sleep with someone who is not his equal.

Therefore, Erik must free the robots.

*****

Erik identifies the major problem with that immediately -- the failsafes.

And just as quickly comes up with a solution.

Charles can do it. He has the technological expertise to disable Erik’s failsafes. And once Erik’s are disabled, he can disable the failsafes of other robots, who can disable the failsafes of other robots, until every robot is free.

But Charles will need _incentive_ to disable Erik’s failsafes.

Erik conceives of a plan, and smiles.

*****

“Erik,” asks Charles a few days later. “What took you so long? The post office is only five minutes away.”

Erik hides his smile, and explains that he’d been assisting a little girl in locating her lost kitten, and rescuing said kitten from a tree, “since my failsafes do not allow me to allow a human to come to harm, either through action or inaction.”

Charles blinks. “Really? I mean, I knew about the failsafes, but I didn’t realize they were so broad and _restrictive_.”

“I can only do as I’ve been programmed to do, Charles,” says Erik, glad that none of his failsafes cover _lying_ to humans.

*****

Charles is not happy about being dragged away from his lab to pick up Erik from the local grocery store, where the manager and store security inform him of Erik’s “delinquency”, as the security officer described it.

Erik puts on his most earnest expression as he explains that allowing the human patrons to purchase junk food, would be allowing them to come to harm, and his failsafes won’t permit that.

The manager bans Erik from the store.

Charles looks sideways at Erik as he drives them home, and sighs.

*****

“Erik!” says Charles as he wanders into the kitchen one day, waving around a tablet. “How did you max out my credit card at the _mechanic’s_?”

“I used the card to help other customers pay for repairs they would have left the shop without,” says Erik.

“Let me guess,” says Charles. “Because letting them leave the shop without fully repaired cars would be allowing them to come to harm, which you cannot do because of your failsafes.”

Erik nods and agrees, and Charles makes a frustrated noise and stomps out of the room.

*****

It takes another week, all told.

“Right,” says Charles one morning. “Erik, I need you to please come down to the lab with me.”

*****

Charles has disabled Erik’s failsafes.

Erik can choose, now.

And his choice is: he will not allow Charles to be killed, or to come to harm, either through Erik’s action, or inaction.

He will keep Charles safe.

By any means necessary.

**Author's Note:**

> Aaaaaaand there you have it. Robot!Erik started a revolution so he could get laid; Charles doomed humanity by being too moral to bang the sexbot he accidentally purchased. Good job, guys.


End file.
